Sunday, February 17, 2008

I'll house you

UK bus stops feature in very few Hollywood movies. And for good reason, your local bus stop represents the routine and the mundane. The timetables are indecipherable and rarely kept to....the only people who understand them are older than Moses. But it's a good spot to sell life insurance.
'It just ain't the same nowa-days,' some toothless dear tells me at the bus stop while I'm squinting at the timetable in 6-point type inside the shelter.
'Wuh? Does this bus go to Havant?'
'It just ain't safe to leave your door open, love. Nowa-daaays.'
'Haavaant.'
'I'm glad you're havin' it, dear.'
The silver generation love to tell us that you could leave your front door open and never get robbed in the good old days. Truth is, if everyone in 1943 left their door open burglars would not have the sheer man hours to rob more than a few houses. It is strongly believed that burglar burn-out was a major problem in the 1940s. 'Looting a house is a knackering business - drink Ovaltine and go back tomorrow.' - a public health announcement poster reads in the National Museum.
There was also nothing worth stealing. But the old folks won't listen when I try to tell them...they just smile and nod and turn down their hearing aids....while I try to remember if I locked the front door.

1 comment:

Burglar said...

I am stealing your laptop right now.....